Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
Randomize
