So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
i used baking grease as lip gloss
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
