he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
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