Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
