I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
Randomize
