No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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