for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
Tomorrow's Mother's Day and the only thing I can afford is beer and the McDonalds dollar menu. Do you think a Budweiser and a Big Mac says thank you for me fucking up your life since 1990?
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
