yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
Randomize