lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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