Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
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