I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
Randomize
