What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
Who did Billy Mays play for?
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
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