Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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