Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
Randomize