Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
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