Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
Randomize
