And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize