I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
3pm strippers are depressing
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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