Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
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