Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
