i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
Randomize
