Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
fuck your aforementioned shoe
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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