your parents love me but you hate me
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
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