What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize
