hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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