Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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