Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize