I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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