Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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