dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
Randomize
