his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
