just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
Randomize