I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
I am one with the molecules
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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