Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
Randomize
