there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
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