I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Randomize