This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
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