Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
this beer tastes like vomit already
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
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