I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
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