haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
