And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
Randomize