like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
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