stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
Randomize
