When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Randomize
