I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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