I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
