ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
Houston, we have a squirter
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
whose ass print is on the piano?
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
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