It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize
