watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
