Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Randomize
